Time Stamped Show Notes
[4:31] Nick and Angela have not reached a point where they have specific roles in their relationship when it comes to money. They are both contributing to the household. They share a joint account where a lot of the bills come out of and they each have separate accounts where their paycheck goes. They have all their expenses auto-debited. Angela makes more money so she has been taking on more of the role of the bread winner recently. Nick feels that this dynamic is evolving. Angela feels that their financial dynamic works for them because they haven’t had a lot of contention.
[6:57] Nick and Angela need to get on the same page as far as their financial goals. When couples are on the same page as far as what they’re working towards, a lot of the arguments regarding money tend to go away. By the end of the episode, Nick and Angela will have to come up with their most important financial goals and then they will formulate the method of achieving it. One other thing that Nick and Angela both agree to is that, they are afraid that they are spending too much now and not saving for the future. They need to start thinking about retirement and making it a priority. This is because the younger we start contributing, the longer it has to grow. So we always want to make sure that we’re using compound interest to be on our side.
[12:51] When it comes to money, we all have stories that we tell ourselves. One could be like, you’re afraid to be financially free because if you feel like if you are, a lot of people will not want to be around you anymore because it would make them uncomfortable. This comes about when we take the context of how other people feel about money and their fears about money and you put them into your life. One thing that Nick and Angela have to start thinking about is to find what is holding them to the fence financially. Is it their life story where they live for the moment and not plan for the future? Is it that they feel they don’t deserve it? It is important that they find what is holding them back financially.
[15:41] There are two things that are a valuable part of growing financially. One is to be in touch with ourselves. The second is to practice gratitude. When you’re beginning your day with an attitude of gratitude, you really are able to see the day in a whole different light. Starting a day with gratitude, one feels energized. One way to add gratitude to your day-to-day life is to add it to your journaling.
[18:52] Emotions play a critical role when it comes to money. Nick and Angela need to find the emotions that they default to when it comes to money. Is it anxiety? Is it contentment? Becoming aware that these feelings are their emotional homes. It will give them the power to decide if this is where they want their emotional home to be. When they will start finding these things about each other, it will give them a lot of insight into why people act the way they act.
[22:50] The way people deal with money is how they’ve grown up. Nick and Angela will have to each understand how they grew up and they will tackle any money stories they have. How did their childhoods look like in terms of money? How did their parents spend money? What were their views on money? Did they talk to them about it? Also they will each have to look at how they have been using their money from the time they left their parents’ homes?
The 5 Love Languages – Gary Chapman